


Twin Hearts.

by mythborne



Series: A saga of hearts..... [2]
Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, also Bella has a backbone, but have fun with chara characters, i build things to fit my own little world, i vary WAY off from canon in this, just saying
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-16
Updated: 2020-10-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:35:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 17,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25297741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mythborne/pseuds/mythborne
Summary: Bella Swan had once thought she had her forever. But she soon learnt that the picture-perfect love was not everything it was made out to be. Nine years later she returns home for a friends wedding and soon learns that she has been tied with another for over a decade. That whilst she had lost one forever, there was another waiting in the shadows to claim her heart.
Relationships: Bella Swan/Original Female Character(s), Bella Swan/Sam Uley, Paul Lahote/Original Female Character(s)
Series: A saga of hearts..... [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1796218
Comments: 12
Kudos: 28





	1. Take me back home

**\- La Push, Washington -**

**\- Bella -**

**\- October -**

If there was one thing she had forgotten about the La Push reservation was just how calming it was. Even now as the silence of the house drifted around her, she felt calmer than she had in a long time. Her soul felt at peace for the first time in nine years and the weight that had been ever crushing on her soul was finally released and her lungs free to drag in as much oxygen as they wished.

The place was almost like a fairytale in a way, somewhere that was a sanctuary for those that needed it. For those that were lost in a world of chaos, they could come here and feel all their worries slip away and leave them like dust on the wind. Even those who had been spurned by destiny, they too could find peace on the tribal grounds.

Speaking of destiny, she had read somewhere that everyone’s future was planned out. That every decision that a person thought was random, every choice they made that felt like it was in a spur of the moment. Was actually preordained and simply a step along the right path, bringing them closer to the crux of their destiny and the future they were to have. From the moment you were born, to the moment you died, it was all written out in black and white.

If that was true, she really wished she could get a bloody refund. As if this was the path her life was supposed to take, some things were sitting in her history that she’d rather forget.

From her love affair with a vampire which led to marriage, to the destruction of said marriage and the loss of one of her best friends. All of it was steeped in regret that some days threatened to swallow her whole. She had looked in the face of two people and believed one was her forever and one would forever be by her side. Alas, she had lost both and was left to wander in the darkest of the abyss.

It was strange to stand, twenty-eight years old, and looking back on the last decade of her life with regrets. She wished, often enough, that she could reverse the time and stop her seventeen-year-old self from making what would lead to being one of the biggest mistakes of her life.

She wished she could go back to that fateful day in biology and make sure she never encountered Edward Cullen or his attention. Maybe then she would know true happiness, maybe then the pain she had lived with the past decade would be nothing but a distant memory.

_ Yet this was her life _ .

She had fallen head over heels in love with a vampire and threatened to give up everything. A teenage infatuation that she swore was first love, an infatuation that consumed her every thought and decision. Her life became intertwined with the supernatural and leading to her almost being broken by a rogue vampire and yet that didn’t deter her. She was adamant to join the life she had found herself within, willing to walk away from everything for the promise of forever.

And then there was her fateful eighteenth birthday, a simple papercut leading her whole life to come crashing down around her. She had read many books about heartbreak and had sworn that the hole in her heart was what she was feeling. Now, she realised it was just the after-effects of vampire glamour. Her mind was so warped by Edward that she couldn’t breathe without him.

Her only solace had come in the form of Jacob Black, the sunshine she used to better herself. In her warped reality, she told herself she needed him, that without him she would drown in the darkness that threatened to consume her whole. Yet the darker truth was she was using him, using him to hold the hole in her heart closed. Used the feelings he had for her to her own means. She was selfish and didn’t deserve Jacob, and yet she wouldn’t be without him.

Even as he fell in love with her, tried to convince her that they were destined to be together. She told him, over and over that they weren’t meant to be. Even in her selfish need, she had the right mind to tell him that, yet he dug in his claws and she found herself once more at the mercy of another.

Even as Jacob’s world brought with it the other monsters in the night. Shapeshifters. She found that because of the vampires she was so linked too, boys lost their free-will to the monster inside. Forever bound to hunt down the cold ones and stop the threats that loomed in the dark. Paul had been right when he had snidely said it was her fault, the blinkers over her eyes refusing to let her see just how much.

_ But punching him in the face had at least been worthwhile _ .

Slowly though, she began to repair herself. The jump of the cliffs being her way of saying goodbye to the vampire who haunted her and washing herself clean so she could be reborn. Though, as always things never did go her way. Victoria getting too close, two new wolves phasing in and a vampire returning and messing things up.

In one small blink, she was off to Italy and fighting to save the life of the man who had left her behind, forever tangling her further into the world she didn’t truly belong. The vampire kings scarring her and for a moment making her regret her decision to become involved with Edward. Yet the promise that she would be turned, the promise that her love would return to her had stilled her tongue and lured her once more into the vampiric trap.

From there, her life became a whirlwind once more, a marriage proposal, a newborn army and another threat to her life. All of it closing in on her and leaving her gasping for breath as she slowly cut every tie that bound her to this life. She wanted nothing but Edward and the promise of their forever.

Even as Jacob told her of imprinting, told her how he never would and he could love her better than Edward. One half of her wished he’d never uttered those words, whilst a more silent part prayed he saved her from the gilded cage she was stuck inside. A bird with no room to fly. Her wings clipped at the whims of her vampire masters.

Whilst she didn’t love Jacob, she wished he’d saved her but she chased him away. Lost his friendship and that of the wolves. The moment Victoria was killed, she was now the enemy. Soon to become one quite literally as her wedding neared and so did the honeymoon. The promise of one final act being the only thing her heartbeat for, the promise of knowing the most intimate of loves whilst human.

The bruises had been painful, even under the smiles she showed to her love. Though his eyes had betrayed a hidden darkness she had never seen. One-touch and her whole world started to fall apart, soon her mind became her own once more. Edward refused to touch her, to kiss her, to be near her.

_ Her life had fallen apart _ . She gave him everything and he wanted nothing.

For six months she wilted away in her gilded cage, praying for the love she had been promised to return to her. Yet it never came, the coldness seeping in and freezing her soul. Leaving her empty and alone.

Her true saving grace had come in the form of Rosalie and Jasper, the two releasing her from her cage. Their hands guiding her wings to once again fly as they got her an annulment as well as the papers to leave and build a life. Their parting words were the only thing that returned warmth to her ever freezing heart.

As she sat on the plane they’d chosen, she had felt the hole rip its way through her once more, the feeling of being alone settling in and making her want to turn around and return to Edward’s arms. To take whatever he wished to give her, as long as he held her close. Yet Rosalie had told her to live, to find the happiness that was truly hers and she vowed to do just that.

She vowed to live and know warmth once more.

New York was a haven she didn’t know she needed. She was a blink, a shadow masked by eight million people and she was surrounded by normal at every turn. The college she went to, to get her teaching degree didn’t have vampires hiding in its halls. It had normal people, who bled and lived like her. People who worried about their test scores instead of staying hidden from her vampire ex-husband.

And slowly but surely she began to repair herself over the next six years, she had relationships, found solace in the heat of passion even if she never truly cared for those she slept with. The relationships and friendships short-lived but stepping stones towards her healing, towards her living the life she should have lived.  _ A human life _ .

The one downside was that the pain still remained and at nights she found herself dreaming of the wolves. A constant reminder of the only other place she’d felt at home, on the reservation land. But it was the black one, Sam, she dreamed of most. Soon the dreams always morphed into his look of agony as she got married, as though she had ripped his heart out and smothered it.

_ Though she had no idea why _ .

So yeah, if her life was pre-written somewhere, someone really needed to revise the pages and make some changes. Because she wished, with everything within her, that she hadn’t gotten tangled up with the Cullen family. That she’d had the smallest shred of self-preservation to keep herself away.

But that wasn’t her world.  _ Not anymore _ , she would forever be the stupid human who fell in love with a vampire and punished a wolf in the face. The human who was running from the Volturi and praying one day they didn’t find her and end her life over a game she was a pawn within.

She would admit though, that four years ago life had dealt her a hand she didn’t regret. Her split decision to stay in Colorado and visit the local bar resulting in her finally finding somewhere to belong. For the first time in four years, ever since she ran from her husband, she finally felt like she was home.

Skylar Ragnulf had been the one to help with that. At first, she was nothing more than the bartender who calmly handed over the drinks Bella threw down her through without any cares. Something that soon turned into a conversation that felt natural, the two talking about their hometowns and learning they were neighbours. Bella from Forks and Skylar from La Push.

She hadn’t ever met the woman and soon learnt why, just as Bella moved to town and met Edward, Skylar moved away. Their paths so close but pulled in different directions but their choices.

It had been so easy to talk with Skylar, that Bella could finally breathe. And when she’d offered her apartment for Bella to stay in, she was sure it was the quickest decision she’d ever made. She didn’t need to think, she didn’t need to worry about the danger she was bringing to her new friend. She just acted. For the first time,  _ she did something for herself _ .

With Skylar being in the military there were times where Bella was alone in the apartment and it gave her the sense that she was once more in control of her life. And even when Skylar was home, _ it was just as easy as breathing _ . The two moved through a routine as they intermingled themselves in each other’s lives. They found a steady camaraderie that allowed them to coexist in relative peace.

She would admit though, finding out that Skylar was a shapeshifter,  _ a destined alpha _ , as well as the cousin to Jacob Black had been a surprise. But what did she truly expect? She’d run away from the supernatural world for four years, did she really expect to be gone from it forever. Yet despite knowing the supernatural was once more in her life, she didn’t shy away from it. She embraced it, she was a wolf girl -  _ always was _ \- and it was time she stopped denying it.

A year into their friendship things had changed, they crossed over the boundary from friends to friends with benefits with an ease that made Bella’s head spin. It wasn’t forced,  _ it was natural _ . And more than that, they were both going into it with their eyes open. They were using each other, Bella wanting a way to forget everything that plagued her and Skylar was chasing away her own demons.  _ The drug they chose was each other _ .

Even with the knowledge that they both had other lovers, it didn’t change their dynamic. If anything it strengthened their friendship, Skylar soon becoming the one person Bella could confide in. Her fears over Edward one day finding her, of her memories in La Push and the way she had felt so at home. And in return, Skylar helped her get stronger, taught her how to stand up for herself,  _ to throw a punch _ . 

They both gave in equal measure, something Bella was ashamed to admit she wasn’t used too.

When Skylar gave birth to her daughter Emmie-Jo, she slipped into the aunt role with ease. Her and Skylar’s friendship was strong enough that raising the little girl together was just the next step in normal. Whilst others looked down on them, not understanding the way things were. They simply took it as another thing that made them who they were.

She met Skylar’s brother Sonny about a year and a half into her time with Skylar, she barely remembered him from her time in La Push and almost instantly she knew he was a part of Sam’s pack.  _ Like Jacob _ . But when she was around him,  _ it was easy to forget that _ . His easy-going nature was so natural that she found herself laughing, enjoying the time spent with the younger male that reminded her of Jacob in so many ways. Her favourite pastime was watching Skylar and Sonny together. The way they’d move in sync, always in tune and always there when the other needed them.

He became another one of her true friends. Him, Skylar and their stepbrother Cole. Three people who understood the supernatural world because they were a part of it, and each of them brought something to Bella’s life that helped her feel as though she was finally normal. No longer having to put on a facade that she was something she wasn’t. She could be the nerd who read for hours, the clumsy girl who fell over her own feet and spent most times within the ER. She could just be.

With the Cullen’s she had always felt insignificant, the clumsy human amid perfection. That no matter how much she tried she would never truly fit in unless she was one of them.  _ But with her wolf family _ , she was just as normal as they were. Yeah, they had superior senses and speed, but they made mistakes too. They bled as she did, and the blood didn’t whip them into a blood-crazed frenzy. She was just Bella. Plain and normal Bella -  _ and that was okay _ .

_ She was happy to be normal _ .

One thing she’d never expected though, was to return home. She knew it was always a possibility, she couldn’t run forever. Not when her father was still the chief within the small town and she had ties there that still wrapped around her like steel ties. And when the announcement that Sonny was to be married came about, she knew her time had run out.

The younger wolf had invited her and there was no reluctance on Bella’s part, eagerly agreeing the chance to be Skylar’s plus one. She had been happy to be invited, wanting to watch as her friend and his imprint Mina solidified their love. Even if it meant that she had to come back to one of the places she had been running from. For her friends, she’d do it. She’d risk the chance of being found, of not being wanted, just to be with her friends.

_ Plus she was truly happy for them _ .

She could remember when Jacob had first told her about imprinting with vivid detail, believing in her teenage naivety that it was the story of true love. Of course, at the time he had used Skylar and Paul’s story, to show that it could be ignored, that it wasn’t forever. Though she had ignored those facts, she had simply locked her sights on the tale of true love and refused to be moved.

_ God was she an idiot _ .

But since meeting Skylar and Sonny, as well as the other wolves of Colorado, she had since learnt that it was far more than that, the imprint was simply a nudge in the right direction. And without a true basis of love to keep it alive - it became nothing more than a shackle. Resentment could grow in place of love, that not everything could be summed up with the ‘mates’ title and expect happiness and forever.

She felt a little better about that. Knowing it wasn’t just her love story that had gone down in flames. A fact that she’d mumbled and had Skylar laughing for a good ten minutes. The wolf finding the hidden humour in Bella’s misfortune.

Yet all the discussion did was remind her of how much Jacob had wished to imprint on her. How he was so adamant that her future lay with him, even telling her he’d never imprint anyway because he was to be alpha but being with him would be as easy as breathing. It was enough to make the blood in her veins run cold.  _ He had been her best friend _ , and despite how much she wished it, she could never love him that way. She had failed in showing that,  _ and failed to the point she lost him _ .

But at the time she thought she had true love.  _ She thought she had her forever _ .

Fast forward eight years and she was back in La Push, surrounded by wolves, from two different packs and wondering just when her life had become so complicated.

“ Sweet Bella Swan – ” the rich lupine croon makes her jump. 

The cadence of it startling her from her musings. Her balance wavering as she almost crashes to the floor. Even after all the work, she’d done to reign in her clumsiness, the wolves still managed to bring it forth within her. Their silent steps scare her and make her poor human heart race towards the heavens. A futile glare settles on her face towards the she-wolf yet the gaze itself likes any fire as she walks forward, arms outstretched for a hug.

“ How come you didn’t go with my dad, Leiah and Cole ? ” Skylar asks as Bella moves forward.

“  _ Given my history here _ – ” She sighs, the words met with a curiously raised brow. “ I figured I was safer walking in with the bitch of La Push. ” 

She was using the other wolf, remembering the tales Jacob had spoken about how his cousin was the most feared fighter in La Push. The elder Ragnulf having used her fists to carve a path, carve a reputation that no one dares look down upon. Yet as Skylar laughs,  _ Bella knew the other didn’t blame her for it _ . Once more the two of them were using each other, and they didn’t even care. They allowed it to happen and would simply move on to another issue afterwards.

“ And where’s Emmie-Jo ? ” 

Bella hums softly in response. “ She’s gone ahead with Sonny and Mina. ” 

Skylar’s hum is the only answering response as her fingers once more return to braiding her waist-length hair. Silence soon creeping in and causing Bella to look over her shoulder. Seeing the spot where the she-wolf once stood now empty. Her head shakes minutely, knowing that even after a decade, she still wasn’t used to the silence in which the wolves moved. How one moment they were there, the next gone.

Yet being home, she was going to have to get used to it. She was now surrounded by them once more, two packs,  _ a lot of wolves _ . Her eyes track to the forest idly and she almost expects to see lupine eyes staring out from inside the foliage, daring her to come closer and lose herself within them once more. 

She was home and once more her life had changed. She wasn’t sure if it was for better,  _ or crazier _ .


	2. Lost amongst familiar strangers.

**\- La Push, Washington -**

**\- Bella -**

**\- October -**

It was strange to her, how her life had changed in nine years. Gone was the shy girl she first was when she moved to Forks, then there was the insecure girl she was whenever she was around the Cullens. The way she used to constantly compare herself to the vampires around her, always knowing she didn’t fit in. From her clumsy antics, to the way she hated dressing in designer clothes and hated Bella-Barbie more than anything else. Then there was the lost girl. But now, she was just Bella. And it was almost freeing.

She wasn’t perfect, most days she was still exceptionally dull and nothing more than a bland human surrounded by supernatural perfection. Or least that was how she coined it. She’d long since learnt that the wolves, were anything but perfect. Sure they were built to handle supernatural threats, but they were as normal as anyone else. They scarred, they bled and often weren’t dressed in much.

_ It gave her a semblance of normalcy _ . 

Her jealousy barely rises as she sees Skylar come down in her dress, whilst her best friend looked absolutely gorgeous she also knew that the wolf was as uncomfortable as shit beneath the fabric. Her dog tags barely hiding the scar that Skylar hated above all others, well sorta. The scars on her stomach were very firmly in first place but the one on her heart, the one that nearly stole her life was a strong second.

“ I’m pretty sure that dress is going to earn you quite a few looks, and those looks more than Paul’s fist. ” 

She comments softly as she eyes Skylar’s outfit. Bella couldn’t remember much about Paul, minus the fact he had hated her and she had punched him, but the one thing she did know. Was if anyone was Skylar’s perfect opposite,  _ it was Paul _ . The two were very alike, volatile and protective but also hid a weakness beneath the surface that they didn’t let many see.

She had been more than a little surprised when Skylar revealed about them being mates, and told the history that started far back before the two even became wolves. A small part of Bella - the part that was still a hopeless romantic - was betting on the two working things out. Skylar needed someone strong in her corner, she was dominant by nature but she needed that person who she could be vulnerable around. It wasn’t Bella, _ it had never been her _ , but maybe it could be Paul.

Skylar’s lips curve into a smile as she shakes her head. “ You forget, Paul wants nothing to do with me. Therefore, in my opinion,  _ people can look all they want _ . ” 

Bella’s responding laughter is soft as she idly shakes her head. 

“ Oh, tonight is going to be amusing. ” 

She was still smirking in humour as Skylar led her from the house and into the car, the wolf not trusting her to walk in a straight line without visiting the ER. But if she was honest, she didn’t put much stock in herself either. With the nerves that were rattling through her very bones and shaking her down to her marrow, she had no idea of just how coordinated she would be.

All she could think about was the fact that she would be in close proximity with the pack once more. The pack that had abandoned her the moment she married Edward.  _ Not that she could fault them _ , everyone believed she was about to become a vampire which meant she would be the natural enemy of the pack. And well it’s hard to retain friendships when that little hurdle is in place.

But this was the first time since the wedding she would be near any of them, and she wasn’t too sure if she was ready for that. She couldn’t avoid it, Sonny was a member of the pack as well as Jacob’s cousin meaning that if there weren’t pack members around. Something was wrong. 

Selfishly she was leeching off Skylar’s reputation of being a bitch, using it to create some distance between herself and the ones she wasn’t sure if she was ready to interact with. Praying that Jacob had some form of fear in regards to his cousin’s nasty temper to keep away from her and allow her one simple night to hang out with her friends and have fun.

_ But fate had never been her best friend _ . 

“ I can hear your question from here. So you might as well ask it. ” 

Skylar’s chuckle and the weight of her eyes snap Bella from her musings and makes her realise she’d been staring at the side of Skylar’s head whilst her thoughts ran a mile a minute.

She grins sheepishly and prays the wolf buys her words. “ I was just going to ask. How’s the hunt going ? ”

“ It’s not,” Skylar replies instantly. “ For some reason, I can’t seem to find the fucking assholes leaving the scents. And it’s driving me insane. ” 

She can’t help the small chuckle that slips off her lips, an agitated Skylar was always amusing. The corner of her eyes would crinkle and despite the fact she was agitated, it did nothing more than make her appear as cute as a puppy. But noticing her friend’s confusion at the laughter, she decides to put the wolf out of her misery. So to speak.

“ Skylar, you are the pack's best tracker because of  _ that freaky gift you have _ . But more than that, you are second in command. Not because you’re going to be alpha one day, but because you have a military mind. Maybe you don’t look at this hunt the way you are,  _ like a wolf _ . But look at it like a soldier, what would you do if this was someone trying to break into camp in the middle of the night. ” 

There was a silence that spread out between them after her words left her lips but soon a feral smirk bloomed over her wolf friend's lips and she returns it with a saccharine-sweet one of her own. She was glad she could help, to give an outsiders vantage point on something that was clearly bugging her friend. It was another thing she had since learnt, she wasn’t useless. She couldn’t help in the fights but she could offer guidance.

All too soon though they pull up to the location of the engagement party and she’s almost positive she can hear her stomach drop through the floor and gather at her feet. Her nerves once more wracking havoc on her system as she fights to keep the soft smile on her face. Climbing from the car she’s thankful Skylar offers her arm as she wasn’t sure if she would be able to stay standing without it.

As Skylar leads the way, she concentrates on not falling flat on her face, her steps wide enough to keep up with the wolf at her side but practised and delicate so as to not cause a commotion. Yet as the two enter the hall, she can feel as every eye snaps to her. Sonny’s loud voice announcing their presence and drowning Bella in everyone’s looks. Automatically her body curls into Skylar’s overheated one.

“ Chin up. Remember you’re a guest of me and my brother. ” 

The words are whispered in her ear, but she knew every wolf could hear her. And the strength in them was enough for her to uncurl from her friend’s side. Her fingers take the purse just as she sees her niece come barrelling towards her mother. Sonny only a few steps behind her and she gratefully accepts the hug from the youngest Ragnulf, his mouth forming the same words his sister had spoken and injecting another dose of strength into her system.

And as she follows Sonny, pulling the wolf into an animated conversation about his upcoming wedding she’s able to lie to herself for a moment. Lie that they were back in colorado and not surrounded by wolves she hadn’t seen in ten years. If the youngest Ragnulf had an idea as to what she was doing, he doesn’t comment, something she was thankful for as the two converse easily.

Soon her niece catches her attention and she listens as Emmie-Jo babbles about a stay at Sam’s house, Bella’s brow lifting slightly at those words. She knew half the history surrounding Sam and Skylar but not all the details. All she knew was her friend was not a fan of the alpha, so whatever it was, it was huge. But to allow her daughter to stay with the man she hated must have taken everything the other wolf had inside of her. Bella knew better than most that Skylar was not easily swayed.

“ He wants me to stay away from him, and I will respect his wishes. ” 

Skylar’s voice drags her attention from Emmie-Jo and to her friend, an eyebrow quirking at her words as a smirk danced across her lips, a smirk that is easily mirrored on Sonny’s lips -  _ neither of them truly believing the elder wolf  _ \- for they knew she could be stubborn, far more than anyone in this room. 

And Bella also knew under all that false bravado, Skylar was helplessly in love with the volatile wolf. Probably always had been, and always would be. It was a twisted fairytale and one Bella was hoping came true for them both, they both deserved a happy ending. Out of everyone she knew, it was Skylar that deserved it most and by default Paul.

“ If you say so sis,  _ if you say so _ . ” 

The next four hours were spent either drinking with Skylar, Sonny and Mina or allowing Cole to drag her around to mingle with others filling the hall. Cole was someone who stuck out like a sore thumb within La Push, where most of the tribal members were reserved and enriched with their history. Cole was gay and proud, flamboyant in his actions and took no shit from anyone. It was exceptionally amusing watching him interact with her father, the usually calm Chief of Police, unsure of how to handle the male before him.

But then again not even Bella knew how to handle the situation nor the reunion with her father. She would admit that she had missed him and wished she’d kept into contact with him more. But she had been scared, scared that Edward would find out where she was from her dad’s thoughts and no matter how selfish she was, she wouldn’t put her father through that.

But it meant that their already strayed bond was strained even further and she wasn’t sure if there was a quick fix for it anymore. How did she apologise for dating a vampire, how did she apologise for wanting to become one?  _ More importantly _ , how did she apologise for taking off and spending the last eight years somewhere he had no idea. 

He had no idea if she was still alive, if she was doing okay. Yet as his arms wrapped around her in a hug, she knew none of it mattered. He was still her father, and he loved her. The tears drifted down her face uncontrolled at that knowledge, that he still loved her unconditionally even if she had been the worst daughter in the world.

She hadn’t seen it before, how much Edward had pulled her away from everyone. How he consumed her every thought to the point she pushed away from her father and made him a stranger in her life. She dropped her friends as though they were nothing, all she cared about was the Cullen’s. Edward. He was her every waking thought, her every dream circling around the male perfection.

Yeah, she had been a fucking idiot. It’s with that line of thought that she makes plans to talk to Charlie the next day, to go to breakfast and catch up. An innocent gesture and yet it carried everything. For she would repair the relationship with her father. He was far too important for her to lose.

_ It was the next step in being human _ .

As much as seeing her dad had lifted her spirits, she was still working her ass off to avoid the pack. Sonny and Seth were the exceptions, it was hard to stay mad at the two of them, it was like soaking in constant sunshine to be in their presence. Their sweet innocence still shining through no matter the fact that they were facing things that most believed only resided in works of fiction.

Cole fit right in, his jovial personality bouncing off the two of them and her sides were aching from the pressure of laughing too much. Something she couldn’t exactly say she had done in a long time. If she was honest, her last real laugh had been the day Skylar gave birth and she listened to her friend bitch out the doctor. But before then, it had been few and far between.

Of course, fate once more screwed her in the ass. 

Her path to the bar had taken her past the table that housed most of the La Push pack, her attention firmly set on listening to Cole make fun of one of the party attendants when she had felt it. The warm band wrapping around her wrist and holding her in place. Chocolate orbs snapping to it and then to the one it belonged to.

_ Jacob _ .

A snort of resentment flutters off her lips as she works to get her hand free, her eyes locked firmly on someone she had once called a best friend. Someone she had turned too to put herself back together, someone she used. But also someone who expected more from her than she could give. Even now she could see that familiar look in his eye as he watched her, converted her every motion - even with his imprint at his side.

Sonny and Mina had introduced them earlier and Bella could say without a shred of jealousy that she liked the girl, Sasha, she was soft-spoken but innocent. A nice counter to Jacob’s nature. And yet, there in his eyes, he was once more making Bella the centre of his universe. Once more ignoring the brutal reality that she didn’t belong to him. Had never belonged to him.

“ What did you want Jacob ? ” Her voice clipped and wrapped in resignation.

“ Well, I was going to ask why you’ve spoken to everyone but your best friend. ” 

Cole chokes on his drink and Bella elbows him in the ribs, hissing as a sharp pain runs through her elbow. God damn wolves.

“ You’re right. I’ve been neglecting Skylar, how bad of me. ” 

Sarcasm was a new weapon in her arsenal, reinforced and born from the Blackwater pack. As was the backbone she now sported, no more was she going to allow people to walk all over her. No longer was she a weak human. And as she feels Jake’s hand once more wrap around her wrist, she allows a small growl to build in her throat.

“ Let me go.  _ Or I swear to god I will scream rape _ . And see if you can explain that one to my father and about ten other officers. ” 

It was an idle threat, yet the fire that burned in her eyes made it seem otherwise.

There was an air of self-righteousness on his face as he looked down at her, his dark eyes boring into her and making the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end.

“ What do you mean I am not your best friend ? ” 

Wow, who was the self-centred one again. She was sure it was her,  _ or maybe Jake had taught her that lesson _ .

“ You abandoned me, Jake.  _ You turned your back _ , so now you aren’t my best friend. Your cousin is, because she was at least there to pick up the pieces and teach me the proper way to move on. Instead of coddling me in cotton wool. You only cared I healed as long as I fell in love with you. All you cared about was trying to force something that wasn’t real. ” 

She hadn’t wanted to do this in front of his imprint, she didn’t want their dirty history to come out. Mostly as she’d rather forget the Bella she was back when she used to hang out at La Push regularly. She was dead, and whilst she carried the weight of that Bella’s mistakes. She’d rather not be judged by them.

But again, fate was a bitch.

“ Yeah because you wanted to become a god damn leech. ” he spits.

“ Well I didn't, did I? ” she retorts with the same level of venom. “ But that didn’t mean I came back for you. I came to watch a friend get married. That is all. ” 

Chocolate orbs trail around the table, looking at all the other wolves who were watching their interaction as though it was the greatest thing she had ever seen.  _ All but one _ . Sam, his intense onyx eyes were locked on hers and where Jacob’s gaze had filled her with terror. Sam’s caused heat to bloom over her skin and a light sheen of sweat to break out against the pale texture.

It had always been that way, a forbidden pull to the wolf who had saved her from dying in the woods. But now, she couldn’t use that excuse. So it was just one more thing to bury and analyse later. For she feared that the look in his eye would lead her to something she wasn’t ready to explore.

“ Why did you come back, Leech lover.  _ What happened _ , the vampire didn’t put out enough for you ? ” 

If anyone could get under her skin faster than Jacob, it was Paul. A small slither of sympathy trailed down her spine that this was the man Skylar would have to put up with for the rest of eternity but then she remembered that her friend could handle his sarcasm and crassness. It was Paul who probably couldn’t handle the new Skylar.

But that didn’t mean Bella wasn’t about to let him walk all over her, she had already given Jacob an earful.  _ So why not the volatile wolf _ .

“ Oh please, Skylar’s given me more orgasms than that sparkly dick ever did. ” 

She took immense pleasure in watching as her words register, Paul’s face contorting into something Bella couldn’t name but the fire in his eyes seemed to grow in intensity. His eyes cutting from Bella and over to the bar where Skylar was now perched with her brother. The two of them laughing loudly after no doubt hearing the words Bella had non-gracefully spoken and made sure every supernatural had heard.

_ Yeah, she needed to stop drinking. Pronto _ .

But it wasn’t Paul or Jacob’s look that had her all but curling in on herself, it was Sam’s. Something passing over his eyes that had her feeling completely naked under his gaze yet at the same time told her she had done something inexplicably wrong.  _ As though she had betrayed him _ in the most carnal of ways. It was disconcerting and she wasn’t sure how to handle it.

Shaking her head she makes her way back towards the bar and the safety that is her best friend, each step made accompanied by a mental berate at how she had just gotten them into a world of drama. She could handle whatever jibes they threw her way, but she had revealed Skylar’s private life too. And whilst it normally didn’t bother the she-wolf, _ things were strained for her too _ .

_ Stupid Bella _ . With a final mental punch to the face, she leans over and reaches for a new drink, only to watch as a toffee-coloured hand snatches it away and out of her reach.

“ Given what you’ve just announced to the room.  _ Safe to say it’s time you slow down. _ ” Skylar teases lightly, her brow hitching high on her face in a hidden challenge.

“  _ What _ – ” an air of faux innocence bleeds into Bella’s words as her chocolate gaze locks with Skylar’s whiskey ones. “ He was still calling me a leech lover.  _ So I corrected that analogy. _ ” 

Yeah, okay that was a valid argument.  _ She’d go with that _ . It was probably the only leg she had to stand on anymore and it was all she could do to correct the damage she had inadvertently caused.

\-- ʚɞ -- 

**A / N :** ** _Reviews are love and highly appreciated_** \- So now as you can see, this is where we start to see the deviations and differences between Wild Hearts and this one. This is where I start to show more of Bella’s interactions but also making it so everyone is aware of which chapter it coincides with in regards to Wild Hearts.

So hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Your reviews mean the world to me.


	3. Repairing broken bridges.

**\- La Push, Washington -**

**\- Bella -**

**\- October -**

One thing that would amuse Bella to no end was how she spent her life surrounded by supernaturals. Her first glimpse at them had been Edward and his family, then she had met Jacob and the shifters of La Push. Then she had walked straight into the arms, well ran would be more fitting, into the arms and pack of Colorado. And through it all, _she felt this was the one place she belonged_.

Bella was human but there was something inside of her, something that told her that she would forever live on the fringe of humanity and forever have one foot in the supernatural world. She attracted the links of the supernatural like a cat gathering twine and without them - without her wolves - their strength, their heat beside her. She wouldn’t know how to live.

When she was eighteen she thought she knew what desolation felt like. Now at twenty-eight years old, she knew she was a goddamn idiot. She had suffered through her first heartbreak and almost killed herself for someone who didn’t even care. Someone who only wanted to selfishly prove he could deny the call of his singer’s blood. A martyr with a fucking twisted sense of humour.

Idly she could remember something Cole once said, about how he believed vampires secreted venom and that was what truly drew humans close. A drug that made _the human prey_ pliable and easy controlled. At the time Bella hadn’t wanted to believe him, didn’t want to think that her every emotion could be summed up in such a neat little bow like that. A pheromone addiction.

Yet there were instances, small little things that made Bella wonder if Cole was correct. She would always forgive Edward when they argued, she would bend to his every will without argument or complaint. She agreed to get married as a teenager for the promise of sex and forever. She dropped all her friends because Edward didn’t like what their thoughts played out - human thoughts that revolved around the vices that made life livable.

And then there was Jacob. When she was away from Edward and with her best friend she found a small shred of herself returning, she would laugh, she would tease and joke as though it was as easy as breathing. But once back with Edward, she would return to the docile little lamb who did everything he wanted.

Looking back on it now, Bella wished she could go back in time and shake some sense into her stupid seventeen-year-old self. Find a way to warn her off the path she was taking and all the heartbreak that would be ahead of her.

Yet she didn’t truly regret her path, as it landed her where she was. A college graduate with an English literature degree, friends who truly loved her and a niece who was so adorable that Bella sometimes wished she could just gobble her up. She’d never thought of kids, but living with the toddler she realised that becoming a vampire would have just landed her in the same boat as Rosalie - missing the sweet innocence of children.

Sighing softly she shakes off the murmurings burrowing deep inside of her mind and drifts back into the easy atmosphere in the kitchen. Behind her she could hear Leiah and Emmie-Jo talking about god knows what, the elder woman indulging the toddler in whatever it was she was discussing. The quietness of the conversation helped to ease the pounding headache that was ripping its way through Bella’s skull. 

Every fibre of her being was glad that she’d rearranged her meeting with Charlie till the next day, her father understanding when she told him drinking with wolves was going to be the death of her. His soft laughter ringing down the phone being the perfect balm for the pain that gathered at the base of her skull.

She should have known better, challenging wolves to drinking contests. Or even trying to catch up to them, she was human with a weak tolerance. The wolves forever healed from the damage to their kidneys and it meant they could outdrink anyone who sat in front of them. Yet she felt happier last night than she’d ever done.

She’d laughed and joked for the first time in years, Cole helping to guide her through a situation that was threatening to swallow her whole. There wasn’t just Jacob she had to contend with, or the fact that some of the tribal members who knew her stared as though she was some alien species that had just crashed landed to earth.

Then there was Sam. Bella had noticed him before, like a stoic shadow that lingered in the shadows. His eyes forever watching her, watching her every movement as though he needed to confirm for himself that she was okay. That she wasn’t going to do something stupid - _past suicidal tendencies aside_ \- but last night. That had been something different.

His eyes had watched her as though he was a drowning man seeing the shore for the first time in years. As though she was the land he was destined to touch down upon after so long. It was a bit disconcerting, her whole being feeling as though she was drowning under the intensity of his gaze. His look said she was saving him, but his look was condemning her into a deep pit.

The more she drank, the less conspicuous she became with her looks, often letting her chocolate gaze linger upon his golden skin. Drinking in every curve and divet of his muscles, the intensity in his features and the way his eyes never seemed to stray from her person. He was always aware of where she was, even when he was neck-deep in a conversation with someone. The smallest shift of his eyes and they would land on her.

Bella couldn’t help but wonder just what he was thinking as he looked at her. Was he remembering her betrayal of marrying one of his enemies, was he wondering if she was going to tear his pack apart again. Or was he concerned about her friendship with Skylar? Something she knew had to be a thorn in the normally stoic males side.

Bella wasn’t dumb, she knew the laws. _She knew Skylar was the true alpha of the Quileute pack_. Half-blood or not, she had phased first, she had phased before Embry meaning she’d phased before Jacob. And given Emphriam’s blood ran in her veins, it meant it was her destiny as his descendant to run the pack. And now Leah had phased, the tribe could no longer fall on the ‘male-only’ sexist bullshit they used to do.

Things were changing and it explained some of the looks Skylar got from the council members. They all knew the power in her vein, _she was an alpha on two sides of her DNA,_ something no one else had seen before. And Bella, well she was stuck in the middle of it all. Just like she had always been. She had a friendship with the Blackwater pack and she had connections to the Quileute pack.

Once more she was picking her side and this time she wouldn’t be able to remain Switzerland through it all.

Sighing, she holds her mug of coffee close after setting down the breakfast plates just as Cole and Deacon wake up. A soft smile sent in the direction of her friend and the father of her friend. As Deacon says good morning to Leiah and his granddaughter - Bella can’t help but watch him.

Deacon was a pure alpha male, his whole body burning with the power that resided within his veins and it oozed from every one of his pores soaking into the room around him. It wasn’t uncommon to feel uncertain around the large male, just knowing he was far more dominant than anyone else, that some subconscious part, even in humans, forced them to submit to the pure alpha in their presence.

It was a stark revelation truly, she had spent so much time around Skylar and her father, two alpha personas and could identify them in a room full of people. Yet when he stood against Jake, _he seemed weak in comparison_. The only one she could truly say resembled an alpha, was Sam. His power wasn’t as strong nor did it choke her chest like Deacon’s tended to do. But it was strong.

It was just one more thing she’d started to notice between the two packs. Though a small part of her realised that lately all her thoughts kept coming back to Sam in some way and she wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not. Or if she truly needed to stop drinking.

Obsessing about Sam Uley. Yeah, now she knew she was entering dangerous territory. She had obsessed about a male once, and look at how that disaster flick played out. She wasn’t in a rush to repeat the situation. No matter the fact her heart sped up like a racehorse every time she saw his eyes were on her.

No, she wouldn’t go there.

'

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* * *

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Her fingers tap against the smooth finish of the diner table, her nails absentmindedly clicking against the divots dug out of the wood from a mixture of cutlery and jewellery as well as natural wear and tear. Her chocolate eyes flickering from one person to another as she watches the lunch crowd mull in and out. No one paying her any mind where she sat seated near the back and out the way of the incessant foot traffic.

Her chuck covered foot taps against the sticky linoleum floor in a reverse beat of that of her fingers. At first glance, one would be forgiven for thinking she was some sort of addict going through withdrawal. Her whole body twitching as she trained her eyes on the door before looking away and back at the people. Her fingers and foot never ceasing their incessant tapping.

But she wasn’t an addict, nope Bella was just nervous as hell.

This was the first true one on one moment with her father in nine years. The party the other night didn’t count as there was always someone around and having to shout to be heard wasn’t necessarily a good common practice for a catch-up. Plus Charlie’s new girlfriend Sue was forever watching the interaction and given her connection to the Quileute pack, Bella would rather do it without witnesses.

So normal, average and not linked to supernatural people it was.

Hence sitting in the diner she had first visited with her father all those years ago as she waits for him to turn up. She’d left far too early but when Paul had turned up asking to speak to Skylar, Bella wasn’t ready to be trapped in a room with that volatile wolf. So she tucked tail and ran.

Maybe it had been a bad idea to leave Emmie-Jo with the said volatile wolf but something within Bella told her that Paul wouldn’t hurt the child. For hurting the child hurt Skylar and well even Bella knew that was a big no-no within the whole imprint scenario. Even if Sky and Paul were in the midst of writing their own damn rules on that one.

A sigh flutters out of her lips as she once more loses herself within her musings - her brain cooking up a rather nice detailed flashback of the dream that had plagued her the night before. It was nothing new for Bella to have over-imaginative dreams - it had been how she figured out Victoria was behind the newborn army, how she’d figured out Skylar was a wolf. _And many others_.

Yet last night - _those were well not exactly PG_ \- she didn’t know what caused them or why the hell she was dreaming of Sam. It was one thing for her current obsessions to drift into her dreams so seeing Sam within them was not out of the realm of possibility. But given she was naked in those dreams, as was Sam. Well, that took things into a whole new world of weird.

_Even for her_.

A blush colours her cheeks and warms her skin as she easily remembers the visage of Sam kneeling between her thighs, his tongue bringing her to heights she had never reached before. His name falling off her lips like a solemn vow. The whole thing made her feel as though she was a temple of temptation and he was a sinner come to worship.

Bella wasn’t the clueless virgin she’d been when she’d first moved to Forks, so the act alone wasn’t the reason a blush coloured her cheeks - or so she’d argue - it was the sheer fact being that she couldn’t erase that image from her head. And as much as she wished to dispute herself, she really wasn’t that perverse to it happening.

_A part of her craved it_. 

Craved to taste the decadent chocolate that was Sam Uley. Yet despite how much she figured it would taste like the sweetest sin that would ever pass her lips. It would also drag her right back into a situation she wasn’t ready for. Being with a supernatural being. Plus the Quileute had the whole imprinting thing - whilst she didn’t know the true machinations of it. She knew it loosely translated to soul mates.

Bella wasn’t sure if she could survive tasting the decadence that was Sam only for him to turn around and belong to someone else. She had been destroyed by the supernatural once and she wasn’t one hundred percent sure if she would survive a second time.

Before she can think on the ramifications of that train of thought for much longer, she finally catches sight of her dad. His familiar gait cuts through the dinner as he stops every now and then to greet those surrounding him. An easy smile buried beneath his moustache but even from where she was sitting, Bella could see it.

See the way it shined in her dad’s chocolate eyes as he conversed with everyone with ease, his mind plucking tidbits of information from the dark recesses of his mind to continue the easy chatter. Who had become grandparents, how old the child was. Who had won the game last Saturday?

It was small things like that, that reminded Bella that her father was far smarter than she’d ever given him credit for. He was Chief of police for a reason and no one got that position just because he was well-liked. He was also able to navigate two friendships with members of the La Push tribe without ever overstepping his boundaries or putting his nose in something that didn’t belong.

She had never really taken the time to observe Charlie before, to watch as he moved through people. When she was seventeen she’d been too absorbed by how awkward it was to be living with the father she hadn’t seen in years - and then there was Edward. But now, she enjoys the small moments to realise that there was more to her father than she’d ever cared to learn.

_But was determined to learn them all_.

“ Hey, kiddo. ” Charlie comments as he finally walks up to the table Bella was seated at.

Leaning down he presses a soft kiss to her temple and she takes the moment to drag in hefty lungfuls of her father’s aftershave, the scent of old spice washing over and bringing a sense of comfort along with it. It did nothing more than remind her of how selfish she was. How self-absorbed she had been around Edward.

How the hell did she make this right?

“ Did you order anything ? ”

Charlie’s voice drags her out of her judgemental thoughts and she shakes her head lightly. “ No. I erm .. wasn’t sure what you wanted. ”

She thought she hid her self-doubt well enough but as a small frown pinches across Charlie’s eyebrows she realises she didn’t hide it as well as she thought. Her hand lifting to subconsciously run through her brunette locks as she prays he doesn’t question her on it. She wasn’t sure she was ready to voice just how little she thought of herself at this moment.

As though mentally called the young teenage waitress who couldn’t be any older than college-age trots over and distracts them by taking their orders. Bella’s voice shakes as she asks for the summer salad and a coke. Her doubt started to seep in at just how this conversation would go, as to whether or not this was the right idea.

“ You okay Bells ? ”

The softness of her nickname makes her smile sadly, her chocolate gaze locking on their elder twin set as she shakes her head, strands of brunette hair caging around the sides of her face as she idly twists her shirt around her fingers. Her dad’s question was loaded in its intensity - _cutting through so many layers of bullshit_ \- leaving a magnitude of answers in its wake. Answers she needed to speak.

“ No, dad. I’m not ” she sighs, moving her eyes to look outside the diner window. “ I’m far from okay. ”

She takes the moment of the waitress setting down their orders to drag in a deep helping lungful of air as she rolls her bottom lip between her teeth. It was now or never and she prayed that she could get through it all.

“ I wanted to say I'm sorry – ” her hand came up to stop her father’s words. She needed to get through this before she caved under the weight of it all. “ I’m sorry that I was such an _ungrateful daughter_. A daughter who allowed herself to be completely consumed by a boy and pushed you away. ”

Bella still wasn’t sure if her father knew about the pack and the Cullen’s but she had rehearsed her speech with Cole so many times she knew how to get around it and keep everything viable for human ears. But despite the practice, she’d put into it, sitting there under her father's critical eyes and saying it all was a different thing altogether.

“ I’m sorry dad. I don’t know why I allowed Edward to have the control he did with my life and just … I’m sorry. ”

Her tongue felt like lead inside of her mouth as she looked sheepishly at her father, his eyes giving nothing away but she could see his lips twitching beneath his moustache as though he was fighting a smile.

“ I know – ” Charlie says softly, his eyes casting around the diner once as though to make sure no one was listening. “ I know what Edward was. I also know about Jacob and the pack. Billy even told me that Skylar and Cole are wolves too of a different pack. ”

She was sure she looked comical, her mouth literally popping open in surprise. As really this conversation was not going in the direction she planned. No rather her father had thrown her for one hell of a curveball. But of course, Billy had told him, those two gossiped worse than women.

Not knowing what to say she simply nods, confirming the question in her father’s eyes that she too knew about them all.

“ Are you... ” Charlie sighs softly, as though the words for him were hard. “ Are you happy Bells. I mean truly happy. ”

Biting down softly on her lip she thinks over his words, her fingers gripping the condensation covered glass of coke as though it was a lifeline.

“ I wasn’t. _I wasn’t happy with Edward and never truly had been_ . I’m happier than I've been in a while. ” she says honestly. “ When I met Sky in Colorado, I was a mess. My self-doubt was so high I thought it was going to drown but she taught me to appreciate myself. _To see myself for who I truly was_. And with Cole’s help, I've achieved it. They saved me. And I don’t even think they know just how much. ”

She’d never voiced those words. Of just how lost she’d been with Edward.

“ Sky saved me from drowning. She was my lifeline and without her, Cole and Emmie-Jo. I don’t think I'd have survived. ” 

She didn’t say how she had been using Sky for years, or how she was being overdramatic. But it was the best way to explain the complication situation the two of them had in a way that Charlie could understand. Whilst he was in the know about the supernatural. It was another thing to be immersed in it the way Bella was.

“ I admit I was confused you were friends with Skylar. ” Charlie starts with a snort. “ As much as I loved that kid, I was constantly arresting her and Paul for some discretion. _But I can see she’s been a good influence_. You have a fire about you now, you found who you truly are. ” 

Bella can only nod. Because if Charlie could see it, _then it was the truth_ . She wasn’t about to argue that fact, because she did have a fire. No longer would she allow herself to be the broken doll who played by everyone else's rules. _She made her own_.


	4. Paying respect to the memories.

**\- La Push, Washington -**

**\- Bella -**

**\- October -**

During the meal with her father, Bella came to the stark realisation that she really didn’t know her father. It wasn’t so much the emotional distance between the two that caused this revelation, it had always been there for the two of them were far too alike in the emotions department. _ It was the simple fact that she had overlooked so much regarding him _ . Before she had thought him nothing more than a passive observer who didn’t see everything that passed by him.

But the more the two caught up on the times they’d missed, Bella realised that Charlie saw far more than most people thought he did. She had bitten her lip hard enough to draw blood as she listened to his observations regarding the Quileute’s and also the changes Skylar had gone through. It was shocking to listen to the critical description that only an officer could produce as Charlie explained the five-second glance in more detail than even Bella would have garnered from such an interaction.

All it did was solidify the knowledge that she would one day have to come clean. She had lied to him once and been able to simply shrug it off as teenage mood swings. But she was older and had spent so many years relaxed in the presence of supernaturals. She hadn’t needed to hide as everyone was in on the secret and it wouldn’t take much for her to slip in the presence of Charlie.  _ And he would be like a dog with a bone _ . No pun intended.

Yet she wasn't sure how she could reveal it all, they had no ties to either pack. Bella knew Skylar would help her but that would put her friend in a precarious position if the news was to get back to Deacon. And the La Push pack was weird with outsiders finding out - something she knew from past experiences. So, for now, she’d have to once more drown herself in lies, and pray that she could contain and preserve a relationship with those details in the shadows.

_ She didn’t have much faith in herself if she was honest _ .

The one thing that hadn’t changed was that Bella was still an exceptionally shitty liar. Of course, trying to lie around a bunch of wolves was futile given they could hear each stutter her heart made, but even when it came to humans. She would stumble over her words, a deep red flush would colour her cheeks and she’d end up rambling a mile a minute which plainly gave away she was being dishonest. It was one of the reasons she rarely lied.

Though she was going to have to do it once more with Charlie. Something that made her heart clench simply thinking about. She didn’t want to lie to him, didn’t want the bitter taste of dishonesty clouding their relationship as she worked to solidify the frayed bonds it currently represented. Yet, she didn’t see any other option. Unless she could once more piss off Paul and have him phase near her father. A thought she quickly dismisses almost as quickly as she thinks it, her mind easily painting the scars that rested along Skylar’s stomach as a deterrent.

Then there was the Volturi. The vampire governing body that even now she was still running from. More than once since separating from the Cullen’s she had caught herself looking over her shoulder wondering when the sea of black would come out of the shadows and end her life. And one thing Bella was sure on and that was she refused to subject her father to the same level of paranoia that she had been living with. He didn’t deserve it, not the pain that potentially came with it.

The pain of saying goodbye to her once more. _ This time a little more permanently _ .

No, that was a burden she was determined to carry alone. Not even Skylar or Cole knew of her previous dealings with the ruling vampires nor the choice she had been given that fateful day in Italy. No one but her and the Cullen’s knew that right now she was supposed to be a vampire. Her heart should have stopped beating leaving her nothing more than a marble statue to watch as the years passed her by. And they would never know.

For she knew her friends, they’d go to war for her. Skylar would take over alpha if it meant keeping Bella safe and she wouldn’t put her friends through that. They all had families, someone waiting for them at home and the mere thought of any of them being witness to Jane’s gift was enough to make her sick. Also with the knowledge that Paul and Skylar now both bore the mating mark - the La Push pack would get involved to protect Skylar and it just meant more lives that were risking themselves for her.

It did nothing but remind her of those fateful months Victoria hounded her and the pack spent their time watching after her and hunting the redhead. A pursuit that resulted in the newborn battle. Looking back on it now it turned Bella’s stomach that her own stupid actions had led to that happening. Her actions lead to children turning into werewolves to fight the monsters in the dark. Not even the knowledge that it was their birthright was enough to calm the guilt the swirled inside of her veins. So as much as she hated those that played martyr, for her friends she would accept the role with ease.

A light touch to her shoulder rips her from her musings and blinking her eyes clear Bella looks over to Charlie, a smile of amusement barely concealed under his moustache. Glancing around she notes the two are now stood outside the diner, the rest of the dinner has passed by in a blur that she can barely remember, which causes a sheepish smile to cover her lips as her cheeks heat in embarrassment.

Yeah great going Bella, just daydream through your time with Charlie.

Mental berating aside she reaches out wrapping her arms around her father’s shoulders as promises to do this more often drip off her lips. It amazes Bella at just how natural those words sound, for so long she had spent her time running for one reason or another and yet she could feel roots starting to take shape once more linking her to Forks. She was unsure of the reasoning behind it, for when she’d followed Skylar here it was with the knowledge that she’d be going back to Colorado at the end of it all.

Yet she wasn’t going to question any of it. Instead, she watches as her father climbs inside his police cruiser, her hand lifting in a wave as he drives past to head back to the station. Her steps are as distracted as her mind as she walks towards the rental car that was currently being passed around the group. Her head tilting to the side as she looks at it, vivid memories coming forth in her mind as she remembers the truck she drove the last time she was here.

A snort flutters into the air as she remembers the disdain Edward had felt towards the classic car, as well as Rosalie’s complaints about the sound of its engine. Remembering the story behind it fills her with nostalgia and she reaches up wiping away a few stray tears before shaking her head and climbing inside the rental car to make her way back to La Push.

That was another thing Bella was coming to terms with - the mundane repetition of doing nothing. In Colorado she had a job, she was a teacher. And on the nights that Cole needed help she was a server at his bar and despite all the leering looks and way too many uncomfortable touches she received.  _ Bella loved it _ . The whole routine of simply doing something, of moving, accomplishing a goal with her own two hands.

It was another thing she knew she’d have craved and missed being a vampire. Whilst the Cullen family inserted themselves into the world of humans more frequently than anyone of their species should. It was never a permanent thing, and just when a pattern was formed. The family was once more on the move and starting everything over from scratch again. If she was honest - it would have driven her insane.

Shaking her head as unwanted thoughts plague her mind she notes she was close to first beach. Knowing Paul was at the house waiting for Skylar she decides to pull into the parking lot. Her chocolate eyes drink in the relaxing vision of the sea as she feels the tension that had been slowly building along her shoulders to simply wash away.

Climbing from the car she drinks in a deep heady lungful of air, the bitter sting of salt hitting her throat and whilst to most it would be unwelcome. For Bella, it was almost a sign of coming home. La Push had always felt welcoming, even before she learnt the supernatural element that had been bestowed upon some of the members, she had always enjoyed the times she would come here. As a child it had seemed like a fairy tale world protected by the trees, now it was nothing more than her own personal haven.

Wrapping her arms loosely around her middle she steps onto the sand, the first few steps a stumble as she’s almost transported back to the last time she was here. So young, so naive and so completely confused.

With a sigh she heads down to the waves, thankful she left her shoes in the car, as she relishes in the ease that washes over her stood there with her toes buried in the sand. Standing in that moment she wasn’t the girl who once fell hopelessly in love with vampires to the point of sacrificing her forever. She was simply a girl allowing the sea air to wash away her sins.

_ If only it was that easy. _

Reaching down she rolls up her trousers tighter over her knees before turning and heading down the shore, her feet silent in the sand as her mind once more churns everything over. This time her thoughts centre around her ex-best friend Jacob. The thoughts coming unprovoked as her eyes land on the spot that used to be theirs.

An old tree stump that over time had rotted and turned into nothing more than a craggy stone that stood out against the sand like an old gravestone. Rather poetic if she was honest and for a moment felt compelled to go pay her respects to the homage of memories the stone represented but thought otherwise.

Instead, she simply follows the shore, allowing the soft lapping of water to calm her heart and clear her mind. Creating a blissful barrier of white noise between herself and the thoughts that were plaguing her since meeting Charlie in the diner. A shred of amusement dances through her as she thinks it all over - her mind bringing forth the memories of Edward - and how he believed she was malleable and without thought of her own.

No one truly knew just how much she did think. Forever dissecting every little thing and looking at alternative options when things became dire. Though Bella would be the first to admit that when she was eighteen, she was selfish. She wanted the best of both worlds and didn’t care about the outcome. Now, it was all she thought about. She wouldn’t condemn another in her place, nor would she force those with families and lives to defend her.

It had been the best lesson the Cullen’s had taught her.

As a wave crashes against her feet, the water dancing over her toes and causing her to let out a small giggle of glee she makes the decision to head back. She knew Skylar had a patrol later in the day and there was also the La Push bonfire that the two of them had been invited too. And Bella was determined to cook something, if only to help bridge the gap between those she’d harmed all those years ago.

Freezing mid-step as she notes Jacob leaning on the shared gravestone of their friendship she can’t help but note the changes in the man who used to be her best friend. Gone was the childhood streaks of innocence that had clung to him despite the adult body he found himself in after his change. Even his eyes that once shone with love and happiness had now dulled and showed nothing but palpable anger. Anger at her, and life in general.

A sigh of resignation flutters off her lips as she walks towards the taller male, knowing their conversation was one that was long overdue. After all, she had known he was in love with her when they were teenagers and despite all of this she had still clung to him like a life raft. Giving him far more hope than she should have done, so yeah she deserved his anger. And she would take every hit he threw her way.

Plus she guessed her attitude at the party was something he hadn’t expected. Yet Bella couldn’t find herself to regret that one small thing. Jacob had once put her in a difficult position and then turned his back. So she felt somewhat justified in her decision. Even if doubt was starting to slither its way around her heart, squeezing it painfully.

“ Jake. ” her voice is lost against the crashing of the waves yet she knew his supernatural ears would hear it. The tightening of his muscles all but confirming it.

She stops a good arm’s length away from him, her eyes boring a hole into the curve of his shoulder as she fights to get her breathing under control. Standing this close to him did nothing but remind her of their shared past.

“ Bells. ” his voice is curt and feels like a knife to the chest. A gasp catching in her throat as pain slices it’s way through her at the harshness.

But almost as quickly as it appears she squishes it down. She wasn’t that girl anymore, the one who allowed both Edward and Jacob to play with her emotions. She had changed and it was something she had to keep reminding herself as her eyes hardened as she finally looked her ex-best friend in the eyes. His hematite ones glaring back at her.

“ Where’s your imprint?. ” She asks softly “ I didn’t get to properly meet her at the party. ” 

It was a low blow, she knew that and yet she had to remind him of the new truth. He was a claimed man, claimed by something as eternal as an imprint. Skylar had gotten a lot of information in regards to the imprint and Bella knew it took place about five years ago. The two had been in a relationship nearly the whole time and were also discussing marriage -  _ before Bella came back _ .

“ Bella, don’t. ” his words were soft and yet with just two words she felt as chastised as a small child. Her skin bristles as she stubbornly brings her arms up to cross over her chest. “ I didn’t come to fight. ” 

_ Yeah okay. _

“ I’m not here to fight either Jacob. I was simply asking after your imprint. I’d like to meet the woman who was made for you. ” she shrugs, her words soft and pleading. Begging him to understand. “ As we both knew it was never me. ” 

“  _ ONLY BECAUSE YOU NEVER GAVE ME A CHANCE _ . ” 

Before she can stop herself, she jumps back, her ankle twisting on the sand and sending her crashing to the ground. Her chocolate orbs were wide as she looks up at the now seething male. His temper having come to fruition far faster than she remembered it being in the past. But maybe this was her fate, to drown in the damage she had left behind.

“ Jake – ” 

He cuts her off with a growl and she closes her mouth so quickly she can hear her teeth slamming together. Her eyes track each of his movements as she slowly turns her ankle easing the pain that was flourishing within it. It was a simple sprain, one of a thousand and with that in mind, she knew she could run if she needed too. A thing that made her stomach turn, running from someone who had once meant so much to her.

“ No Bella, I told you. I would fight for you until your heart stopped beating – ” 

This time she’s the one to cut him off. “ But it didn’t stop beating. Here I am, still blissfully human but you were the one who walked away Jake. You turned your back on me. My best friend. And you know I didn’t love you the way you wanted me too. I couldn’t. And if I did it wouldn’t have made a difference. ” 

“ Why because of the bloodsucker – ” 

_ God was he always this hard-headed _ . 

“ No Jacob. Because you have an imprint, remember. Would you truly hurt either of us by breaking my heart or hers? We aren’t destined to be together Jake. Not like that. ” 

Bella was starting to sound like a broken record. At least as far as she was concerned and it was slightly worrying if she was honest with herself. Though she had to admit it was almost freeing, to finally have the words settled between them, to finally voice the stuff she had been keeping to herself in her naivety. Something she really did regret now.

“ So what? I’m not good enough for you but you can go around fucking my cousin. Because she’s such a fucking pillar of the community. ” He growls, his frame shaking as he fights to control the inferno that was no doubt raging in his veins. “ She’s mated but that didn’t stop you being her whore. Or maybe you were Cole’s too. ” 

Pushing herself to a standing position she glares openly at the man she could no longer recognise. She could understand pain and anger, she’d felt a good handful of her own. Yet she would not stand for him saying crap about her best friends. That was just something she wouldn’t stand for.

“ For your information Jacob. Cole is gay, so it’s hard to be his whore when I possess the wrong equipment. ” she spits venomously “ And secondly, the only person I have to defend my relationship with Skylar with is to Paul. And last I checked you are nothing more than her cousin. Her cousin who turned her back on her, I see a recurring theme here with you _. You run when shit doesn’t go your way _ . ” 

Her hands shake as she clenches them tightly at her side, her nails digging into the flesh of her palm to the point she can feel the skin break beneath the tension. A drop of blood gathering at the tip of her fingers but she ignores it as she heartedly glares at Jacob. She could forgive him for many things, but calling her a whore was probably the one thing she could never forgive him for.

Yes in the years since she’d lived in Forks, she had lost her virginity and sometimes engaged in a one night stand. But her personal life had absolutely nothing to do with Jacob. Not anymore. And if he wanted to be a part of her life then he should swiftly learn that. Or that door would be one that she’d keep closed.

In typical Jacob fashion, Bella watches as he completely disregards her words. Instead of choosing to listen to none of them. It was something she was now realising he did when they were younger. Just like Edward, she never had a choice with either of them. It was either follow their rules or they’d make her.

_ How the hell did she live with that for nearly three years _ ?

“ And I guess Sam is next – ” he sneers with a look as though she was some form of rubbish stuck to the underside of his shoe. “ Honestly. I don’t recognise you anymore. ” 

“ Why would Sam be next ? ” 

Out of his whole statement, it’s those words she locks on too with an obsessive need. The reality that not but a few hours ago her own thoughts had strayed to the elder Quileute. Was it that obvious?. No, it was something else. A small voice told Bella that it was simply Jacob being jealous and yet she felt as though there was more to it. As though once more something was being hidden from her.

“ Tell me, Jacob – ” 

Bella isn’t sure if it’s the pleading tone that surrounds her words, of if he truly wanted to hurt her once more but her words finally break his code of silence. Lip curling back from his teeth as he spits the words that almost stop her heart from beating. Ironic really.

“ Because you’re Sam’s imprint ! ” 


	5. Bonfire Blues

**\- Bella -**

**\- October -**

To say that Bella was confused was an understatement, it swirled within her like the current of a storm. The waves crashing over her head and drawing her under the intense blanket of indecision. Her mind playing catch up with the knowledge that Jacob had so carelessly thrown at her feet before storming away. The weight of it all settling on her chest like a lead weight and crushing her lungs making it impossible for her to breathe. Each breath clawing its way out of her throat.

She wasn’t sure how long she’d been there, knelt in the wet sand, her hands clenching her hair tightly as she works to make sense of the thoughts perusing through her mind. Her mind pulled forth every memory since the moment she’d stepped foot into Forks and stumbled straight into the world of the supernatural. Each one playing out with vivid clarity before her eyes and forcing her to relieve everything she’d ever seen.

The ones filled with the Cullen’s cause untold pain to rip its way through her chest, anger forcing her hands to clench tightly into fists. But alongside those, she remembers everything to do with the pack and every moment she spent in the presence of the intimidating aura of Sam Uley. 

Back when she was a teenager, he was an imposing figure that stood at the sidelines watching her friendship with Jacob play out with critical eyes. He formed the defence of her life and that of her father. He fought alongside the vampires she chose to keep her safe and the lives of everyone in Forks and La Push safe.

_ And he did it all silently. _

Bella couldn’t help but wonder just when it was that he imprinted. When was it that he looked in her eyes and found his life forever tied to hers? Her happiness became his one main goal in life. His entire world bordered on whether she was safe and happy or not. Was that the reason he fought so hard to keep her safe, why he argued so much when the reality that she’d one day become a vampire came about.

She couldn’t even fathom the pain he must have felt when she chose his mortal enemy over him and staying human. It didn’t matter that Edward’s dazzling had made her beyond amenable to any of his whims and desires and most days she wasn’t sure if what she was agreeing too was what she wanted. The crime against her imprint still rang true, she chose a vampire, not the beating heart of the animal.

Though she could feel her anger burning once more and not just for the Cullen’s. For they had to know, they had to know that her life was irrevocably tied to Sam’s. Edward for sure had to know with his infallible tendency to disregard everyone’s personal space and read their minds. But Alice had to see the black hole that wrapped around Bella’s future from the moment the imprinting took place.

It made her hate her ex-family even more than she currently did, the anger so intense she was sure, that fire was going to explode from her hands and scorch the ground beneath her. Yet it wasn’t just those that Bella was angry with, she also found an intense hatred burning for Sam as well. For the way, he had hidden the truth from her, just like the vampire she had allowed to control her.

Bella would admit that she wasn’t completely understanding of the bonds of an imprint, she only knew secondhand information from the mated pairs that she knew. Who albeit stood at only Skylar and Paul and if Bella was to go off their history then that wasn’t that enlightening. Skylar had ignored the imprint for ten years and both her and Paul had become completely different people.

Yet from the tales Jacob had once told her, she knew that the ignoring of an imprint caused both the wolf and the imprint an immeasurable amount of pain. Bella herself could probably name the instances when it had ensnared her and left her chest feeling raw and empty. A pain she had previously titled as dazzling withdrawal. Though now she couldn’t help but question what the cause truly was.

Also riding right alongside that was the main question that burned within her -  _ why did Sam keep it a secret _ \- was he that ashamed that he had the leech lover as an imprint that he’d rather live in pain then tell her what was happening. Or did he believe she wasn’t worthy enough to be his imprint and thus decided that he didn’t want her?

Bella had learnt the hard way that vampires were selfish self-serving creatures, as long as something worked in their favour they were happy. Human life meant nothing to them, the facade the Cullen’s portrayed to the world being nothing but a veneer to hide the gruesome truth underneath. Now, she wondered if the wolves didn’t paint the same picture. She knew the Blackwater Pack didn’t fall into that category, they showed the reality of their position and their status. But kept their humanity during it all. The La Push pack, Bella wasn’t so sure about them.

Soon an entrail of betrayal begins to wrap around her heart like a deceitful viper, clenching it to the point of bursting as once more she’s slapped in the face with the knowledge that everyone in her life was keeping secrets. Those that were supposed to be her soulmates had decided that she didn’t need to know everything, that they knew better than the clueless female. It left a disgusting taste in the back of Bella’s throat and she was almost positive that the food she’d consumed earlier was about to make a reappearance.

Bella can’t remember when it is that she drags herself from the beach and back to the car she’d parked earlier, the notion of climbing in and driving to the house the Ragnulf’s were renting passing by her in a blur. She’s aware the moment she walks in that Paul was situated in the living room with a sleeping Emmie-Jo against his chest but she disregards his company and instead heads up the stairs to the room she shared with Skylar.

The thought of her friend has another slash of betrayal burning across her heart -  _ did she know _ \- was that the reason behind some of the looks she had sent the brunette’s way in the last few days. Or the way she seemed to observe Sam whenever he was in Bella’s breathing space. She had to know, she was as much a part of the pack as the others - both by lineage and by her imprint to Paul.

For the remaining hours before the bonfire, Bella sequestered herself to the room she was staying in. Her mind tried to analyse everything as well as see if she could see some standout slips of information that meant Sam had attempted to tell her in any way. Yet she came up with nothing, nothing stood out to indicate that her supposed wolf soulmate had even attempted to tell her the truth.

Paul’s shout up the stairs rouses her from her musings and she trudges down the stairs, her smile as fake as the light in her eyes as she follows him and Leah out the door. The two wolves conversing and keeping Emmie-Jo entertained as they made the small walk towards the beach that would house the bonfire.

At that moment Bella did feel guilty, she was practically ignoring the little girl that was her niece. The sting of that was enough to steal her breath for a moment, yet a more rational side of her sprang up and made her realise that at that moment, she would be no good for her niece. Her mind was far too occupied to attend to the needs of the small girl.

_ It didn’t hurt any less though _ .

Arriving at the beach and seeing that Sonny was there was a small balm to the frustration she felt at letting her niece down, her eyes pulling from the happy scene of Skylar’s younger brother beaming at the toddler in Paul’s arms, instead, Bella takes the time to survey everyone who was on the beach and awaiting the arrival of the others.

She could see Jacob, his eyes drilling a hole into the side of her head and she was sure if looks could kill, she’d be deader than her ex-husband. Beside him sat the ever jovial Seth and the silently stoic Embry - both of them oblivious to the petulant stance of their packmate. Just behind them stood the wolf who had been churning in Bella’s thoughts along with a maelstrom of emotions she was still drowning in. He looked as he always did, a stoic presence on the outside of the pack, the weight of alpha sitting heavily on his shoulders and ageing his eyes in a way none of them should have experienced.

Yet, with the new information that had so carelessly been granted her, Bella could see the minute differences that she had been blind to before. The way he seemed to track her every movement, his eyes dissecting every change in her facial expressions, his breathing falling into a staccato that matched her own. He was in sync with her without even trying.

_ All it did was fuel her anger _ .

Silently she seethes as she waits for the others to appear on the beach. She knew Skylar would be amongst the last to appear given she had to run back from Colorado. Thus the time it took for her friend to appear was spent with Bella fighting to figure out just what she was going to be saying to acquire the answers that had been escaping her for nearly a decade.

An unknown time later, the sounds of greeting filter into Bella’s ears and raising her head she finally sees the one wolf she knew would give her answers. Yet as she watches the confident walk of Skylar she could feel the anger once more burning intensely. The shrill shout that escapes her throat is barely tangible as Skylar’s name and yet the she-wolf responds and locks whiskey eyes onto Bella. The confusion swirling within her features doing nothing to tamper Bella’s anger, the intensity threatening to swallow her whole. And Bella knew without a doubt that at that moment she was ready to go ten rounds with Satan for the opportunity to rip Skylar and any other wolves ass apart.

Stomping her way over to the much taller female she could feel the sting of her nails as they cut into the flesh of her palm, her hands shaking with the need to punch something. To find an outlet for everything that right now was weighing her down.

And Skylar was her target.

“ _ DID. YOU. KNOW _ ?” each word was punctuated by a rather impressive growl that even Bella was unsure she could produce.

Bella watches as Skylar’s eyes dip down to Bella’s clenched hands, fear swirling within the whiskey colouring of the shifter’s eyes and Bella knows the reason. Skylar was the one who had finally taught Bella the proper way to throw a punch. And whilst her human strength was nothing against the steel body of the woman before her. Bella didn’t care, she would suffer the pain, if only to erase the confusion her friend was throwing off. The confusion that Bella felt Skylar had no right feeling. 

“Bella, I might be a highly trained soldier. But sometimes sweetheart, I need a few more details than that.” 

There were a thousand things that Skylar could have said in response and the reaction would have been the same. The instance the honey bass swirled over Bella’s ears, she lost the tentative hold on her anger and rocks forward. Her weak fists attempting to hit any exposed flesh on Skylar’s frame. To make her friend feel even a slither of the pain that was clenching Bella’s heart and making breathing a pain.

Of course,  _ it was a futile plan _ , even taking away the fact Skylar was a shifter and thus far faster than Bella could dream to be. She was also a soldier, a highly trained soldier who could eradicate any threats to her person. And in a move that is too quick to comprehend. Bella finds her back now against Skylar’s chest and her hands pinned against hers, Skylar’s hands a vice grip on Bella’s wrists.

She wasn’t hurting her, yet it wouldn’t take much for the delicate bone to be snapped. It was enough to render Bella immobile and completely at the mercy of a  _ now pissed off she-wolf _ .

“Look, sweetheart.” Skylar croons, each syllable caressing Bella’s skin and forcing her to listen. “After the fucking day I had, I ain’t in the mood for taking you to the ER. so how’s about we calm the fuck down and you tell me why you’re pissed. Before we end up in a shithole we can’t climb out of. ” 

A tentative nod is all Bella replies with, she wasn’t stupid. She had walked into a situation that was far beyond her control. And as she’s turned to face Skylar once more and sees the way her whiskey eyes darken, Bella knew her friend was less than impressed with her.

“Did you know about the imprint?” 

Whilst she knew Skylar was angry, so was Bella and she was sick of information being hidden from her. Thus she delivers the question with a bluntness that had become a part of her arsenal after hanging around the soldier before her.

“Who told you?” 

_ It was neither a confirmation nor was it a denial _ . 

“Jacob. He told me you knew.” 

For a small second Bella feels bad for throwing Jacob under the bus, he hadn’t said in specific words that Skylar knew but Bella had put two and two together. So she did feel bad about subjecting him to his cousin’s anger, and as she lets loose a deep growl from her throat, joined momentarily by Sam. Bella can see the wolf barely clinging to the surface, the only thing holding it at bay being Skylar’s own control.

“Yes, I knew. Leah told me not long after I returned. But listen before you fucking blow up. Paul is my imprint Bella,  _ my mate _ , which means I am bound by his pack's laws. And those laws state that no one interferes in a wolf’s relationship with their imprint.” Skylar growls, her eyes slicing the air as they return to pin Bella beneath the weight of them.

“Only the fucking wolf is supposed to tell his imprint what is going on.  _ So if you want to get pissed _ . Get pissed at the wolf who has his fucking cock in a tizzy because he’s pissed Sam imprinted on you and not him. Even though he has a fucking amazing imprint himself.  _ He’s still in love with you Bella _ .” 

Bella listened to each sentence with rapt attention and can feel her anger deflate with each scathing utterance from the woman before her. Now that the red haze was slowly evaporating from her eyes Bella could see the true depth of how hard this was for Skylar. Her own imprint had been fucked with and thus she wouldn’t do it to someone else. Even if it meant keeping a secret from her friend.

As another growl, this one far deeper than the first ricochets in Skylar’s chest, Bella allows her gaze to travel around the gathered wolves. She watches as they all react to the sound, all of them lowering their heads as though in a sign of respect and it was once more clear who was the ‘true alpha’. Skylar’s lineage put her above everyone and it did nothing but enforce the sympathy within Bella.

“Think on that Bells, before you blame the wrong wolf.  _ The one trying to protect you _ .” Skylar growls “ Because that was what it was, I didn’t tell you shit because I knew it would mess with your head. And only Sam could fucking rectify the stupid decisions he’d made.  _ No one else _ . ” 

Bella watches in stunned silence as Skylar moves past her, anger radiating from her body and leaching into the air around her leaving it feeling heady and claustrophobic. And it’s with a stunned silence that she witnesses as Skylar rears her fist back and slams it straight into Jacob’s face. His nose is not able to withstand the force of his cousin’s punch as his nose completely crumples and blood coats his russet skin. Whilst the blood begins to turn Bella’s stomach, she’s completely unable to look away from the trainwreck in front of her.

Bella had been told over and over that Skylar had a temper, she even knew the reputation the female had within La Push as the bitch you didn’t want to end up on the wrong side of. But she had never witnessed it with her own two eyes, she had never seen the living proof that her friend was far from beholden to the decorum of playing nice. She was a killer, she was someone who was born to inflict pain and she knew the ways to maximise the result. Skylar had no apologies for who she was, and Bella was now leaning that with crystal clear clarity.

A shiver of fear left an ice-cold patch of dread up Bella’s spine as she came to fully comprehend the demon she had just attacked and how lucky she was that she hadn’t ended up on the same side of that legendary anger that Jacob had. For Bella knew in her case the outcome would have been completely different. Flicking her eyes over to the others gathered on the beach she could see the collection of mixed reactions, yet one shone in all their eyes - fear.

_ Good to know Bella wasn’t the only one scared of the she-wolf _ .

As her eyes land on the dark blazing pits that were now Sam’s eyes, she lets out a rough sigh before tilting her head to the side. Skylar was right if Bella truly wanted the answers that were escaping her, she had to go to the one who was keeping them. Though she would rather avoid another showdown with a wolf, she honestly didn’t see what options she had left at this moment.

It was either face down the wolf,  _ or suffer in silence _ .

Stumbling across the sand she puts some distance between herself and the other wolves, her steps blind and rigid as she prays she’s far enough away that the super hearing that encompassed the others wasn’t still active. Bella was almost positive she didn’t want anyone to listen in on this conversation. She may have learnt that privacy was an illusion but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t like some in this situation.

In an almost mirror image of that morning she turns to see a wolf silently standing behind her. The image may have been the same and yet the stark differences were obvious for everyone to see. The stoic look on Sam’s face was enough to freeze her blood and truthfully didn’t offer much in the way of comfort. Finding a small slither of strength inside herself, she lets out a deep sigh before darting headfirst into a situation she was now almost positive she’d rather have avoided. 

“Why didn’t you tell me about the imprint? Why did you lie for nearly ten years?” 

_ Good to know I'm still taking the blunt approach _ , she thinks wryly as her eyes bore intently into the brown abyss of Sam’s eyes. Up close he was even more imposing and it was taking everything within Bella to now shirk away from the sheer mass that was his body. Instead, she prays that the imprint was still burning within his soul and that he couldn’t do her any harm.

_ God she fucking hoped so _ .

“Because you weren’t ready to hear about it.” 

There was a part of Bella that really wished he hadn’t answered her, because those words. Those words were not ones she wanted to hear that response. Battling the rush of emotion that floods her system she steels her eyes and stares back at his stoic features.

“What do you mean I wasn't ready?” she nudges “I’d already been told I was the mate of a vampire, so why not throw a wolf into the mix?” 

A deep resonating sigh flutters off Sam’s lips and into the air between them. “That was why Bella. You were just recovering from Edward and I knew you’d never accept it. Not whilst that leech still held your heart. It was better you didn’t know” 

“Or maybe you just realised I’d never want you?” She spits before turning and walking back up the beach.

It takes everything within her to keep the tears at bay, she was almost positive she had cried enough tears over the supernatural but once more, life decided she was to be broken by one again. This time by the wolf that imprinted on her. She was realising now why Skylar hid it, and wished Jacob had the same courtesy. Because once more her life was careening off balance and it was taking everything within her to keep herself steady.

But she wasn’t sure she could this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **_A / N: Reviews are love and highly appreciated_** \- Sorry updates have been slow - my other story and real-life have taken over. But if you’re a Jasper/Bella fan, do go check out _Reflections_. If you feel so inclined.
> 
> Also, I also post this story and my others over on FF.net which have more frequent updates. SO if you have an account - check me out at **_Chaotic-Lauren_**.


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